Bordering on a realisation

31 05 2009

I’m finding myself increasingly reluctant to return to certain things when the end of the year arrives, and I can only think of one reason for this reluctance. And it’s a stupid reason.

On the up side, I bought tickets to see Nine Inch Nails in Manila in August, and I can’t say how excited I am for it. Part of the reason I’m still awake right now. I’ll be writing about them in my big book essay around them, so it’ll be a great opportunity. No kidding – I’m really excited.


Can’t believe it

26 05 2009

Tomorrow is the Junior-Senior Banquet, and the finals are just around the corner, followed soon by everything else. Graduation will be on June 6. Unbelieveable how fast this semester has passed, and with it, the end of my first year of teaching at this school.

I had some students give presentations on the projects they took on to make a difference in the lives of those they live around this morning, and after I finished asking my questions, one of my students asked me about what I’ve learned this year. I’ve been thinking about his question ever since.

What have I learned in the past year?

I know what it means to be a youth leader; I’ve worked hard at it. I know what it means to be a teacher, and a friend, and this year I’ve finally learned that the two don’t have to be mutually-exclusive. Sometimes it’s hard to distinguish between the two, but the relationships built are worth the confusion.

Jesus was about relationships, and this is what I remind myself whenever there’s a moment I don’t feel like having students in my classroom during study halls or lunch times. Because time and interaction is much more important than bureaucracy.

A picture I love taken of me and a couple of students after their hard work on a fashion show for the school:

Peace and Anthony

And a more recent picture of some girls hanging out in my classroom, teasing me about my poor lunchbox:

Florence and Diana

These are some reasons for why I love my job.

In honour of later today

10 05 2009

I have to say I am the woman I am today because of my parents. My mother raised me to listen, and provide for others when they are in need, and my father taught me the value of respect, humour, and punctuality.

Together, they have taught me the meaning of family. I don’t mean the “nobody gets left behind” schmoosh; that’s just Disney. I mean the love/hate relationship that is overwhelmingly lovely, loveable and infuriating.

Sometimes I forget who I am because of everything else that happens in my every day, and the re-realisation of my identity helps me live through another day when it is hard.

Thank you. Really. Thank you.

With a desire to document

8 05 2009

I think I’m going to try Project365 this year, making it a goal. Things just keep slipping away.

Catch the NIN reference? 😛

Hard at work on the paper. Due at 5pm.

The walls may finally fall now

5 05 2009

I was in the shower earlier, and was thinking about the meaning of the title I have given this blog: “Walls Finally Fall”. I dimly recall having heard this portion of a line from a song a long time ago, when I first set this blog up; it was playing on the radio station I had logged in to.

The meaning of the title, I have increasingly found, changes for me depending on what I come to writing thoughts down with. On some issues, the walls I envision go no further than the four other people in my family. On others, they reach out to what I do for a living, my career and current (pre)occupation.

I am an educator, a teacher, a “facilitator”, as the snobbishly educational would say. I facilitate learning and other wonderful things like that. But I have come to realise that my job involves much more than this. I encourage students to come in during their study halls (although sometimes when they want to come in I have to turn them away because of a meeting or something like that); I answer questions as honestly and as frankly as I can (although they can be quite, quite embarassing sometimes) because my youth need to know these things and they’ll learn about the things in college – some preparation now does not hurt, in most situations; I spend time with my students, even though I’ve been busy many afternoons with rushing off to class and so on; I have listened to my students; and most significantly, I have always tried to facilitate self-acknowledgement and recognition.

I don’t know what brought this post on, except it irks me when people think teaching is just about classroom – or “instructional” – hours only, and neglect what is actually going on. The goodness, the love, the care, the time and the energy… and it annoys and saddens me even more when students begin to see it that way too.

Ah, something to mull over some more…