3 01 2013

For the first time ever, I had to skip a Nine Inch Nails song tonight. First time EVER. What is going on?!

And another thing: I caught myself smiling at a small child today. Umm… okay.

I must be going soft.

The whole thing with R is giving me a headache, but there was the other M (1: 12.20), and J (1.1-2) respectively, so life is colourful at the moment, to say the least. 1.16 will be quite a day, as it will be after 1.15, which is the PT. Maybe R will join me in Bangkok, maybe not. We will see.

Must not forget.

The move home wasn’t as tragic as I thought it would be – having all chores done by the helper, all meals cooked by M, and company has all made this easier, although the sight of the poor house quiet and empty was quite painful to me. Never mind. Things will be easier next time.


On adapting to changes

6 04 2011

One of the things most educators will tell you, regardless of whether they teach in a local grammar school such as the ones in Hong Kong, or an international school such as the one I’m working at now, is that one of the most valuable skills you can learn is to be able to adapt to changes.

The lesson plans we develop initially go through multiple edits, and they are an entirely translucent matter of their own genre: things we deem to be appropriate for this particular class, on this day, can be completely flat in the other class on the same day, even.

This is the challenge I both love and loathe about teaching. In some ways, I wish the lesson plans I wrote in the first year of teaching were applicable across the board, but I know that that would make me a less effective teacher. Not that I am particularly efficient or effective at the moment, necessarily, but I have seen a lot of improvement in my work and in my calling. One of the key lessons I have learned as an English language and then literature teacher is that flexibility in lesson planning is indispensable in an English classroom.

A birthday coming up, and this is how…

28 03 2009

I’m turning 26 on April 2nd, and I’m deeply unsatisfied with the way things are. I want change, desperately so, and want to usher in the next phase of my life.

And this is a confession: I want to want you, but I can’t, because there’s just too much between us, and yet you’re the first person I think of when I think of that. I ache, and long for truth, for reality, and for clarity, because life is too short for sly games and manipulations.

This headache is kicking my ass and making me something I don’t like.


5 01 2008

no one will ever change their ways if they’re just following a bunch of rules. but if the whole motivation is to try to please the most important person in their lives, then change happens as a direct result of the love borne that person. nobody has ever radically changed their behaviour or habits or perspectives because of some laws or rules; no, the change happened because the person’s whole outlook had been fundamentally changed. it happens when Love meets us where we’re at, as if for the first time…